3 Ways We Can Find Joy Again (Even After Loss)

Sometimes life changes in ways we never asked for. 

A tragedy.  A dream that quietly slips away.  A season of life that doesn't look the way we hoped.

We can't always control what happens to us — but we can shape how we respond.  We can decide what we build next.  We can still create a life that feels meaningful and joyful, even after deep loss.

Last week, I shared a powerful conversation with Teresa, who faced her own unexpected losses — and somehow found her way back to hope and joy again.

This week, by pure coincidence (or maybe not), I picked up a book I’d bought months ago in a charity shop:  Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant.

At the time, I hadn’t even interviewed Teresa yet.  I had no idea how beautifully it would connect.

Reading it now, I realise: Teresa’s story is a real-life example of the ideas in Option B — of how grief can lead to unexpected gold, how adversity can break us open and build something new.

And it’s a reminder of something I believe deeply: 

We have more choice — and more power — than we think.

Here’s how I see it:

1. We can set an intention for how we want our life to feel.

When I was walking through a difficult season, facing uncertainty and situations that could easily have overwhelmed me, I made a decision. 

I set an intention.  Not for life to be "perfect."  Not to avoid pain.  But to still feel palpable joy — even while walking through challenges.

I didn’t wait for life to fix itself before allowing joy back in.  I set my compass toward it — and that changed everything.

Setting an intention for the feelings you want in your life — joy, peace, connection, meaning — gives you a direction to move toward, even when the path is rocky.

You don't have to wait for life to be easy to choose to feel something good.

2. We can examine and shift the beliefs we carry.

One of the exercises in the book Option B stood out to me:  Write down a belief that is causing you pain or holding you back.  Then — slowly, gently — start gathering proof that the belief isn’t fully true.

It sounds simple, but it’s powerful.

Maybe you believe:

• "I’ll never be happy again after this loss."

• "I’ll never find work that fulfils me."

• "I’ll never feel peace while my child is struggling."

• "I can’t feel joy while life feels so uncertain."

But are those beliefs completely true?

If you look closely, you might notice:

Moments when you laugh.  Moments when you feel connected.  Moments when hope sneaks back in.

Tiny glimmers of life reminding you: This isn’t the whole story.

By collecting these small pieces of evidence, you start to loosen the grip of old beliefs — and open space for a new story to emerge. 

You start to see that while the loss, the pain, the challenge is real — it doesn’t have to define every part of your life forever.

3. We can find growth, meaning, and even gold in the hardest places.

In Option B, Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant write about the idea of post-traumatic growth — how people often emerge from hardship not just scarred, but also strengthened, deepened, more connected to meaning.

And the beautiful thing is:  You don't have to experience a huge tragedy to grow.

You can also experience pre-traumatic growth — building resilience now, so that when life inevitably shifts, you already have inner resources to draw on.

Teresa’s story is a living, breathing example of this.  Through grief, through change, she shaped a life that feels rich, joyful, and full of meaning.  Not by pretending the losses didn’t happen — but by choosing to build something beautiful on the other side of them.

We create the life we live.

We don’t get to choose every circumstance — but we do choose how we meet them. 

We do choose what we build next.

We do choose to believe that joy, connection, and meaning are still available to us — even after everything.

If you haven’t watched Teresa’s story yet, I warmly encourage you to take a quiet moment to do so.  It’s a reminder that even when life feels like it’s breaking apart, it might just be making space for something new to grow.

[Watch Teresa’s Interview →]

And if you’re ready to shape — or reshape — the next chapter of your own life... if you want to move forward with more clarity, more hope, and a deeper sense of what you truly want to feel and experience…

I’d love to invite you to join me for a free 7-day course that only takes 5 minutes a day:  From Confusion to Clarity: Design the Next Chapter of Your Life.

It’s simple, uplifting, and designed to help you reconnect with your dreams and your power to create a life that feels like yours.

You can sign up here — it’s completely free:  [Sign up here]

Wherever you are right now — may you remember:

Joy is still possible.

Life can still be beautiful.

And you have more power than you think to shape the next chapter.